must undertake to love myself and to respect myself as though my very
depends upon self-love and self-respect." ~June Jordan, Poet
you are suffering from serious depression, please see your doctor as
soon as possible. If you are just having a "blah" day or suffer with
cycles of depression,
help. Over 35 million American's feel blue every year. One in 5 people go
through a serious stage of depression during their lifetime.
So, what can you do when feeling
Depression may be caused by the repression of
your soul's deepest expression. ~The
I created this page during a time in my life when I was very
depressed, felt lost
and was struggling to find my place in the world. On the outside
I seemed fine, but inside I was hurting. I pray this page will help you if you
going through a stage of depression. For me, it lasted years, but I hope
you can find your way out of depression much faster. No matter what
is happening to you right now, know that you are loved and
that this is a stage in your life, perhaps one of the ultimate challenges
you will face in this lifetime. May you make it through
this stage of rebirth and awaken on the other side, renewed,
open to possibility and alive with love for the world.
The Top 5 Things that Help me on a Daily Basis:
1. Exercise - yoga, pilates, dance,
stretching, walking, riding
2. Eating Healthy Foods and
Taking Supplements - Vitamins and especially Omega 3
3. Reading Books on Positive Thinking and Spirituality. I think
a belief in God helps me, but I also need information on
how to put my beliefs into practice. When I make good
decisions, I'm happier and I have less to be depressed about.
4. Taking lots of warm baths with healing essential
oils and sea salts
...for some reason this works! I'm officially
in love with LUSH beauty products. They make me
happy for some reason. I think it is the essential oils.
Olive oil moisturizes while grapefruit, lemon oil and mandarin orange
oil refresh. This is a large foaming bath treat that looks like a big
fizzy orange vitamin pill that you put in water. It seems to foam slowly
and eventually I broke it into pieces to help the process along. It kept
fizzing and foaming creating tiny orange and yellow islands within the
bubbles (I added some bubble bath first - you might want to try some
Happy Hippy shower gel).
Eventually the water turned creamy (olive oil and hemp oil) and this
bath reminded me of a creamsicle. Bergamot, orange flower and gardenia
also make this a beautiful calming bath that leaves you in a good mood.
This bath is fun with the Lemslip Buttercream. I keep applying some
"Whoosh" temple balm to my wrists and happily inhaling deeply.
This bath made me feel warm and snuggly and in the mood for lemon
meringue pie or lemon sugar cookies or lemon tea.
This is a good bath for the morning or evening, depending on your mood.
I was drinking Celestial Seasonings Tension Tamer Extra with this LUSH
experience. If you love "Happy Hippy" shower gel, this fun
bath product will impress you.
~The Rebecca Review
Depression can appear as:
Anxiety, irritability, physical aches and pains, insomnia "empty"
pessimism, helplessness, loss of interest in pleasurable activities,
persistent digestive disorders, chronic pain that won't go away, appetite
changes, decreased energy, oversleeping and thoughts of suicide.
can appear as:
Mood swings, inability to concentrate, obsessive behavior, inability
to sleep, irritability, increased desire for isolation.
healthy. Researching interesting
subjects is not just a way to pass the
time, it can lead you to
information that could change your life.
2. Give yourself permission to be happy: Look outside yourself to see
how you can make
the world a better place. People who feel
needed are happier. Surround yourself
with family and friends. Buy a bunch of
flowers for yourself or for a friend.
will make you feel good. Infuse your space with scents like jasmine and
Outside: Celebrate cold weather by engaging in a seasonal sport, cross- country
etc. When light enters your eyes, it
stimulates the brain to produce serotonin.
This triggers a cascade of chemical changes in the brain that
significantly improves your mood.
They say that getting sunlight
can make you more happy than vigorous
So, exercise in the sun to brighten your mood. Laughing
also helps, walk with a friend.
a friend to a movie and have a day out shopping. If you are more in
to stay home and watch movies, go to
and start making lists
of movies to see. I love relaxing in the evening with a good movie or working out
with the exercise DVDs. They have so many, you will never run out of entertainment
exercise routines. Plus, you can review the movies or give a friend
gift certificate and start your own
the afternoon or evening going to a movie that will make you
big part of staying healthy is having goals, things to look forward to.
I'm doing the work I was put on this earth to do. I live in a place where I like to be.
the ability to influence our own lives more than we know.
It's not just luck. ~Christiane
some great books and swaddle yourself in a cozy comforter. Candles are
for the mood. Try reading a book of a different
genre. Creature Comforts
10. Visit a
beautiful church or go to a show, play or concert. Tune into a
different radio station.
Discover new television shows.
Meditate in the morning and buy some Yoga
workout tapes. Research shows that meditation
is good medicine for your mind. This
is called taking care of your "inner balance."
12. Take a
short nap in the middle of the day so you are not so worn out!
a Sunday or Saturday.
a chair close to the window where the sun comes in and read
a book indoors in the
your windows in the winter to make them sparkle. Take the day off
clean your house.
Feeling like you are in control of your own
can be very healing.
Organizing things and keeping things
orderly is good for peace of mind.
Helps - When I Clean My House
I Feel Like My Mind Clears
I also love trying out Feng Shui principles...
a survey of 1,500 men and women last year, HeartMath found that the more
spent on a computer, the more likely they were to be depressed. Of those
who logged more than
30 hours of weekly Internet usage, 45 percent said they felt exhausted
often or most of the time, 37
percent reported sleep problems, and 17 percent said they felt less
to friends and family than they had a year before." ~Organic Style,
think it helps if you are listening to good music, then maybe you won't be as depressed.
Personally I get
depressed if I watch too much TV and feel more creative while working
online or watch movies that deal with real-life issues.
IDEAS Set a Timer while you are online
Take a break from news and the internet
Answer e-mail once a day at your convenience
Don't let people pressure you into
answering e-mail immediately
"yes" to your priorities. Fight the
Scale down your expectations.
Write down attainable goals.
a nice hot bath with a few drops of your favorite essential
Buy a new
perfume or soaps with a floral or exotic scent.
in the tub, condition your hair with a aromatic hair mask. Spoil
Deeply - If your blood contains too much carbon dioxide, it can make you
18. Stand up
Straight. Posture can make you feel energized or tired. Yoga
19. Go to the
library and look in the humor section for some great books.
a break from radio and TV news for a few days, that is sure to depress
Play some favorite music.
Negative thinking is one of the
most destructive forces in our lives.
Those voices in our heads can have a profound effect on how we see the
Listen to what you are saying to yourself and replace the
negative messages with positive
Light 20 candles all in one room. Nurture Romance and beauty in
Befriend positive people. Cultivate those friends
in your garden who
uplift and inspire.
Join a forum where people are positive and
Comforting & Creative Solutions, December 30, 2006
"Self-compassion is not about losing your inner critic;
it's about transforming it
from a bitter; self-destructive voice
to one tempered with humor and forgiveness." ~Michael Burgos
Patricia Alexander and Michael Burgos have created a beautifully
designed book with artwork by Dean Andrews. The backgrounds on each page
seem to embrace the quotes, wisdom and personal experiences of the
"The siren's call to `toxic' short-lived comfort is loud and
alluring and can draw out our own good instincts for comfort that is
real and meaningful."
The Book of Comforts explores: comfort vs. indulgence, obsession vs.
hobby and toxic vs. healing. How do you comfort yourself and not feel
guilty about spending time on yourself? How can you validate yourself
and validate others? By looking at stressful issues with a renewed sense
of vision this book teaches you to expand your interests or even to
reconsider the miracle of sleep.
This book takes you a little beyond chocolate and bubble baths and
explores the benefits of essential oils, like vanilla and the benefits
of exercise, like yoga. The book is divided up into three main sections:
Some of the highlights include:
Cultivate a Hobby
Unwind in Water
Act with Self-Compassion
Renew Your Connection with the Earth
The authors have survived numerous life challenges and have come face to
face with their own needs for creative comfort. This universal need to
soothe the soul is expressed beautifully in quotes, tips, anecdotes and
even a cute observation from Ender the Cat.
"Even humans have recognized the value of the Cat Nap, which can be
done on almost any corner of a soft bed." ~ Ender The Cat
This book would be perfect for doctor's offices, massage therapy waiting
rooms, gifts and as an introduction to the healing benefits of healthy
comfort. The ribbon to keep your place is a thoughtful addition and the
padded book cover makes this a comfy read. I liked the advice like:
"Get thee to a Jacuzzi" or "Take Yourself to the
While this book may inspire you to add more comfort to your own life, I
found that this book could also be helpful in giving you ideas for how
to provide comfort to friends and family. The section on massage may
inspire you to buy someone a gift certificate for massage or you may
find yourself creating CDs of soothing music or inviting a friend to go
for a walk out in nature.
Patricia Alexander and Michael Burgos have written a book with ideas you
can incorporate into your daily routines. Soon, you will find you are
happier, more satisfied with life and enjoying each moment with a higher
level of contentment.
~The Rebecca Review
a Gift for Someone...
23. Start a
book club or join in on a discussion board about life and books.
24. Drink a cup
of peppermint tea while researching better eating habits.
Food is the
ultimate energy source.
something wonderful in the winter, like cinnamon rolls or bread.
some spiced cider on the stove to simmer can really make you
Create a Nostalgic Mood by baking
oatmeal cookies or a loaf of garlic
Analyze Your Cognitive Distortions and Correct them Accordingly
Rejecting the Positive - This is when you can't accept something
good happening to you.
Overgeneralizations - Obsessing over negative situations.|
Victimization - Thinking every setback makes you a failure.
Name-calling - abusing yourself with negative thoughts.
Being Clairvoyant - Thinking all the outcomes of your life will
be negative, so why even try?
* * *
* * * * *
Affirmations to Help You Heal
I will learn to say no more often to make time for me.
I will make stressful items a lower priority because
life is supposed to be fun.
I will continue to improve my situation.
I will continue to address problems and learn to
move forward with renewed purpose.
I will consider the possibilities and reach for the stars.
I deserve compassion and care.
Today I will find a way to rest, relax and have a moment of
I will learn to accept change and choose to change for the better.
26. Buy some
aromatherapy bath products for the shower. Look for uplifting scents.
a bottle of lavender
oil on your bedside table, it will give you sweet dreams. :)
28. Make dinner
for friends and include a fish dish. Studies show that if you eat fish
at least once a week, you might be less depressed because fish
contain high levels of omega-3
polyunsaturated fatty acids necessary for optimal brain function and
feelings of well-being.
You could also have pizza with
anchovies or shrimp.
a puppy or kitten
from a shelter.
That will give you a million laughs and you
will be saving a life.
30. Buy new
sheets for your bedroom, the more luxurious the better. Think about
at least one thing
that brings you happiness each morning when you awake.
31. Buy someone
a card just for fun. You will be laughing in the card isle if you look
funny cards. Even more fun...take a friend with you and you can share
Accept that you can't change everything or control everything. Go with
enjoy the good and the bad. That is what makes life
interesting! Be a survivor.
Nibble on a piece of chocolate.
It contains phenylethylamine and theobromine.
This boosts your own mood-elevating chemicals, serotonin
Remember how lucky you are! There are so many people
out there who have so much
less than we do. Think of the simple things like how warm the sun feels on your skin.
an Angel to Someone!
Give money to a charity
or volunteer in your neighborhood. Helping someone will give you
immense amounts of pure joy. Even if
you think you will feel overwhelmed, the sense
of "giving of yourself" will actually increase your
Learn from the wisdom
of the ages. Read
quotes and make them part of your life. Read
great books and learn everything you can. Life is so
much more interesting when you are
always learning something new. If the problems in life get you
down, look for something
you can learn from them. Read up on the problem. You never know who you are going
to talk to who might enjoy hearing about a solution you discovered.
Take a deep breath and reflect on the beauty of being alive! Even
in the difficult times
we can feel very close to God. Let Him nourish your
soul and wait until you can
see clearly again. Don't rush the lessons in life. Sometimes the sad
us more than we can ever learn on a happy day.
Find a way today to make someone else happy! It is the key to your own
Seek help from your doctor or counselor if you still feel depressed and
have tried everything
you can to stop feeling blue. You
may need to take medication if natural
work for you.
Decide to be happy and pray to God to help you learn the lesson you may
in a time when you are feeling blue.
Having hope in the future can get you through this
time when you are developing as a soul,
in the journey called life.
Make a list of everything you want to do in life...the really important
Like watching pigs race, etc. Don't doubt even that will make your day!
Find "52 Things to Try Once in Your Life" (a box of cards by
Lynn Gordon) and
"Yes, You Can!" by Sam Deep. To find the reviews...link through the
Allow yourself to grieve if you have lost someone you love. "Death
is not the
greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies within us while we live."
Keep your loved one alive in your memory. Cook something they loved, remember
Grieve, forgive and remember. When I lost my grandmother I was completely devastated
and now I
feel that she is looking after me and cooks with me in spirit.
of being angry that she is gone, I look
forward to seeing her again one day in heaven.
You will cry, you will feel angry at first, you will feel as if your
world has ended, but death is
only the beginning for those who die, a
in the next life with God.
one fun thing to do today:
Walk in the snow in the winter
Walk outside in a flower garden in the Summer
Play a piano
Sign up for a Fitness class
Listen to a Symphony
Make a list of your good qualities
Reward yourself for reaching a goal
Take deep breaths
Try a new exercise video/dvd
Take notice of nature around you
Listen to the rain
Eat by candlelight
to a Concert
Site by a fireplace
Write in your journal
Write a Poem
Fly a Kite
Go out and get an ice cream cone
Paint or Create something from clay
to a Museum
Read a Magazine
Bake a Loaf of Bread
Pop some Popcorn
Go to a Sporting Event
Resolve bitterness. Forgive anyone for everything they have ever done to
Swallowing your pride allows you to free your soul and be
who you were meant to be.
Admitting you are wrong is terribly hard, but always worth it. Focus
on the future and
how you can mend the relationship. Disputes are normal in life, they help us emerge
from a conflict with a clearer, stronger and healthier
What can you do to improve yourself? If you like yourself...won't you be
happier? You might have
so many interests buried inside of you
just waiting to jump out and surprise you.
Simplify Your Life. Cut back on the complexities of your everyday
Learn to say no sometimes
and nurture your spirit.
Yes to Feeling Sexy
Make your Work more
Fun! "The Secret of Success is making your
Vocation your Vacation." -Mark Twain
The happiest people find their purpose in life and follow their bliss
Increase the Self-Esteem of others. help people see the beauty in
Help them reach their goals.
"The greatest good we can do for
others is not
to share our riches but to reveal theirs." -Author
Accept Change. This too will soon pass!
"When it is dark enough,
you can see the stars." -Ralph Waldo Emerson
Breathe deeply because God loves you and cares about you and wants you
to have joy in your life. Pray that he will show you the path to his
joy, the kind
only He can give you.
Try acupuncture or massage. Go for a manicure and pedicure.
Spa Day at a local Spa then go out to
dinner. Spoil yourself or ask for
gift certificates for gifts.
Take a child to the zoo or learn calligraphy.
56. Turn off the news and listen to relaxing music. www.Rhapsody.com
I look up music and you can listen to entire albums and
keep a list of your favorite music.
Rapid Release into Peace:
Dragon and Phoenix Music for Massage
simple act of scrutiny-asking, 'Does this serve me or does this hurt
- forces a light of consciousness to be cast on the habit. Habits seem to prefer
once exposed, theybegin
~From the Power of Self-Coaching by Joseph Luciani,
Clinical Psychologist and Lecturer
59. Talk to a friend who understands you as a soul.
60. Exercise more and visit your doctor
to check up on your health. I love buying new
workout DVDs and reviewing them. It gives me motivation to
exercise more when
I know I can also write about
Build a Website - This keeps me busy and I always have enjoyable
do. Send me a note and tell me about your favorite movies,
music or books.
70. Send me a book and see a
review appear like magic in a few months.
OK, it does sometimes take a
bit longer, but I enjoy reviewing and
as fast as humanly possible.
Insomnia: For sleep problems when you are depressed, try the
A relaxing bath with essential oils like
ylang ylang and lavender. You can buy inexpensive sea
salts in bulk at a natural store and add
your own oils. I put oatmeal in a muslin bag along with
dried rosemary and add milk powder or
buttermilk. Very relaxing...
Ask your doctor about valerian or drink
chamomile tea. Chamomile is known
for its sedating effect and can help to relax muscles.
Establish bed-time rituals like reading a
book of poetry or a few chapters of a novel.
Watch a calming, relaxing or romantic
Do a yoga DVD - some knock me out
completely because I get so relaxed.
Kundalini yoga is recommended because it focuses on meditation and
Limit caffeine to two eight-ounce cups a day or drink green tea and Rooibos
Keep paper and a pen or a notebook/journal by the bed to jot down
thoughts before bed.
This saves you staying up thinking about all the
things you have to get done.
Some people recommend a gratitude
even writing out all your negative
can help you get them out of your head.
Listen to relaxing music.
Reset your body clock by going for a early
Buy blackout shades or a sleep mask.
own love story about the life you would like to have
and then start to
make it come true.
heart will be exposed and, yes, broken. But it's important to remember
that a heart is imprisoned not by being broken but by being
~Martha Beck, author of Finding Your Own North Star
Buy a small bag like an Asian tote bag, a journal and a beautiful pen.
Copy your favorite quotes or poetry into the journal. If you can find a
beautiful print of art you enjoy, paste it on the journal and brush
"Mod Podge" over the picture so you can create a custom
journal. You can copy photographs too and make beautiful customized
journals for friends and relatives.
Find something in your house you are not using and donate it to charity.
I can usually find a small bag of items I'm no longer using and someone
else might benefit from the items.
Give someone in another country a gift they will love: www.worldvisiongifts.org.
This is sure to make you happy because giving is one of the ways you can
experience more joy
in your life. The gifts are really fun, like you can give a family a
camel or sheep so a family can have wool and wholesome milk. There are
fruit trees, gardening supplies and building supplies for a school. You
could donate money for an entire school and you get progress
can also give items to kids in America, like basic necessities, blankets
and toys. One of my favorite items is the Mongolian Ger - a Yurt house
you can give to a family to keep them safe from the elements.
It is pretty heartwarming to know someone out there in the world is
enjoying life a little
more because you are alive. Now that is a reason to live!
Beat daily stress by getting ready for your day the day before.
Buy yourself flowers.
106. Take a 30-minute walk
107. Go get a massage and a facial.
108. Write down more of your thoughts to clear out your mind.
Remember the things that you love about life.
Be your true authentic self who is satisfied, happy and wants to be
Reward yourself when you accomplish your goal of being happy even
a moment. Positive
Crying as Expressed in Cultural Context, December 15, 2006
"Tears have been central to myth, religion, poetry,
and fiction through the ages, but until recently, remarkably little has
been written in an attempt to explain and understand tears themselves.
Perhaps no other fundamental human activity has received so little direct
and sustained attention." ~ Tom Lutz
Tom Lutz presents an understanding of tears to explore crying as expressed
in cultural context. He explains the reasons why people don't weep at
funerals in Bali, reveals the chemical content of emotional versus
lubricating tears, and delves into tribal rituals that seek to wash away
"Crying: The Natural & Cultural History of Tears" looks at
tears from every angle an anthropologist could wish for and while Tom Lutz
uncovers the mystery and intrigue of tears, he also appeals to the
psychologist in us all who longs for deeper explanations. This can at
times read more like an intellectual treatise rather than an emotive
argument, but all the while, Tom Lutz seems to seek a validation for
crying in a world where no one can agree on a similar standard for the
shedding of tears. Some cultures have specific rules for when you may or
may not cry that seem shockingly cruel on the surface, but reveal an
underlying need for survival in difficult circumstances. The harmful
mourning rituals of some tribes made horror movies sound like a summer
The spiritual significance of tears is especially interesting, as is the
way humans express their feelings of loss. As Tom Lutz so aptly states:
"...without desire there are no tears." Desire takes many forms
and at times a desire that is fulfilled is also the cause for tears. We
may also fear the loss of what we desire or desire something we can't have
and so are then frustrated.
What can you do in the first twelve weeks of life that will ensure a baby
doesn't cry as much in the future?
How do parents in tribal situations deal with crying?
Why do some cultures promote weeping and expect demonstrative grief, while
other cultures shun the idea to the point of removing a weeping person
from the scene of a funeral?
Why are men more comfortable with crying in our modern society?
A discussion on childcare unveils a few details that didn't seem pertinent
to the topic at hand, but do reveal a certain curiosity of the author. The
way he explores this topic made me think he may in fact have written this
book for an audience of psychologists. While this book is very intriguing,
it doesn't seem to reach out to the casual reader, nor does it keep
specifically to the topic of emotions.
For the adventurous reader, the topics expand and travel to new
destinations, opening the mind to ideas that relate very much to the
dimensions of the soul and the deeper understandings of how humans
function on all levels of existence. This is not a casual study of
emotions, but more of an in depth discussion of everything related to
crying and its cultural significance. This topic is fascinating and if you
have an interest in Homer, Freud, Plato, Shakespeare, Socrates, Darwin,
Hippocrates, Aristotle, Dostoyevsky, Dorothy Parker, D.H. Lawrence, Daniel
Goleman and Dr. Benjamin Spock, then this is your book.
Philosophy, psychology, medical terminology and cultural expectation are
all cleverly woven together to create a fascinating and well-researched
unveiling of why we cry. If you want to research this topic even more,
there are lists of movies and books within the pages of this book to keep
you busy for years! If you love this book, you may enjoy books by Daniel
Goleman, especially "Emotional Intelligence."